ABIENT ABUSE- help me identify the abuse

hELLO,

I know that I suffered from general
-brain washing of who he was and also

-gas lighting
-denial of all issues which looks like ignoring my feelings "Your emotionally unavailable" RESPONSE "No im not" Which leads me to think I am wrong and doubt myself


what others meta behaviors and abient abuse is out there.


I didn't get looks.

I do remember tones of voices like when he'd get conceptual with me which I put a stop to.

he'd get up in my space for sure when he was pissed and spit on me when he was talking cuz he was so close, eventually I pushed him back, I got sick of that shit. My body would automatically respond it was saying You are not doing this to me anymore!! you are not bullying me!!! And it was like I couldn't stop it, my body just responded automatically. then I felt like shit for pushing him. (one time I through a book at him LOL)

hi salter - from my experience ambient abuse is like covert, covert abuse. twice as covert! its incredibly stealth and is thought to be the most dangerous psychological abuse there is, due to its slow but steady wearing away of ones ability to connect with reality. a form of gaslighting.

it can range from looks, tone of voice, hints, suggestions, a depressive vibe, subtle gaslighting etc. I have dealt with it a lot and can verify how the consistent and persistent effects can wear your down. like fighting an invisible monster only to leave you confused and exhausted. the only advice I have is to try to anchor yourself in your own reality and understanding of your environment and detach from the npds. they are mentally unwell and what they are doing is intentional. hard to battle the cognitive dissonance with that but start to question yourself honestly 'would someone healthy and loving treat me like that?'.

there is a subtle 'off' feeling I get with ambient abuse. like a gut reaction. when I get that feeling I remove myself from my immediate surroundings and be by myself to commit to working out what just happened and rectifying it in my own mind. untwisting the reality they put on you...if that makes sense.
daisy4, x