Richard Grannon Spartan Life Coach

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Richard Grannon Spartan Life Coach

Richard Grannon The Spartan Life Coach Narcissism Support


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    The Burden Of Promotion

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    JamieB


    Posts : 9
    Join date : 2018-10-08

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    Post by JamieB Wed Oct 10, 2018 12:59 pm

    I have Hyperhidrosis, my hands and armpits sweat, more than normal. It interferes often. I also have social anxiety. My social anxiety is mostly because I have the Hyperhidrosis. See the feedback? Years of this have compounded.


    With each job opportunity , each change of employer comes the need to start again. Meet people from scratch, speak in front of unfamiliar people in unfamiliar situations, work in unfamiliar surroundings, learn new networks. Each time the employer is bigger with more different meeting rooms and more different meeting occasions . The challenge becomes harder.

    Both my social anxiety and Hyperhidrosis (sweating) mean that every career aspiration is sandwiched by depression over the hardship all these things will cause me, the grief, the stress, the discomfort , the beggining is the worst. Around 2 years in things settle. Meanwhile, they having nothing to do with my ability to do the job (mostly) but cause a grief, significant grief given my challenges. I’m competent.. all feedback indicates this too. But inside, it can be hell.

    Anyone been here, seen the light? The only way out is through by the look of it.


    sara44
    sara44


    Posts : 25
    Join date : 2016-10-28

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    Post by sara44 Wed Oct 10, 2018 3:28 pm

    JamieB - i can't tell you how important and significant your talks with me have been about "Flashbacks and Present situations". i looked you up to add a significant piece to my last entry - and it also has something to do with what you wrote here just now (will get to that below). As far as Hyperhidrosis - i understand you feel anxious, but i just wanted you to know that who you are, what you are about is significantly more of a focus for me over a little issue like Hyperhidrosis - so what if you sweat more than "normal"? It would have absolutely NO impact on my thinking that you are a wonderful human being. It would not detract from my view of you as a person. I would, however, have a significantly different response to someone who harbored ugliness in their spirit - it would be an aversion. I just want you to think about this as reality. I personally know that things i feel about myself i magnify (which is a psychological behavior), magnification is a cognitive distortion. I love to watch people with disabilities function because i admire how they just go on and live their life and aren't focusing on their issue. I wish i was more like that - so i totally get where you're coming from, but, that doesn't mean magnification is right to do. I used to be a nurses aide and wonder - have you checked out thyroid or diabetes as a possible root cause? Also, have you tried visualization? we can control pain with our minds... ie. when you hit your knee on a sharp corner and it is intensely hurting, imagine that there is a hole in the skin and the pain is flowing out bigtime and fast - pain time is shortened. Studies have been done to prove this mental power over body processes. Here is an article that briefly touches on the power of the mind on healing. https://appliedsportpsych.org/resources/injury-rehabilitation/using-the-mind-to-heal-the-body-imagery-for-injury-rehabilitation/

    Significant piece to my last entry...
    MY LAST ENTRY...your descriptions of "how to detach" will be studied for sure - thank you for your loyalty in describing it to me.

    As i read i realized that I am the one who is not allowing the catastrophizing thoughts to pass, they stay strong - a defense against the threat (perceived or real).

    I know thoughts of worse case scenarioing are always triggered, but i feel uneasy just letting them go in case they are true about a present situation (like you mentioned - wanting to do what i can to get the upper hand.

    Since sometimes i can't know the outcome of a present situation it's not possible for me to say it's not a worse case scenario that will occur.

    this reasoning keeps me doing it.

    i wish i could relax into what Carl Benedict was saying - to just tell myself the catastrophizing thoughts are not true, but simply the knee jerk reactions of a wounded mind.

    SIGNIFICANT PIECE TO THIS LAST ENTRY OF MINE:
    I understand my predicament, and i've stated before that i believe in a God who can help me with things - i was just looking for the psychological structures for this persistent problem to understand the dynamics. The dynamics are clear - auto thoughts of worse case scenarios come forward automatically because of my past and cptsd - this is a fact -
    what it comes down to is a CHOICE... when a present situation triggers the catastrophization process to begin, i can choose to either go with it OR I can choose to give it to God, trusting him to help me with whatever happens. Matthew 6:25 - 34 - this God who is in control of everything (Dan 2:21) who loves me enough to die for me, who knows all about me and my problems, who promises to help me and who provides for all my needs, is saying, I created you, I know how to sustain you and will care for you.Its a matter of choosing to give the issue to him and trusting him with it instead of letting the issue eat away at who we are and rob our lives of joy and peace.

    I would have been amiss if i had not shared this with you.

    Best,
    Sara
    D3lt4
    D3lt4


    Posts : 101
    Join date : 2018-07-24
    Location : Europe

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    Post by D3lt4 Thu Oct 11, 2018 6:42 pm

    Hi there, Jamie,

    I don't know about that illness you mention but I know what's being like stuck because of health issues.

    A few years ago I tried running to improve my health. It was awfully hard. I have asthma and a problem in my neck. Also, my knees hurt. I tried though.

    I quit sugar - like all products from the supermarket that are processed food like cookies, crisps, and just anything but fresh fruit and vegetables. Also fresh fish if you live by the coast.

    I started to increasingly feel much better, not just physically, but mentally too.

    A couple of years later my neck got much worse. Running was not a good option. I tried swimming, but there are some chemical products making it impossible for me to swim. I got sick after a couple of days swimming.... options? I always hated going to the gym. Everybody seemed to care so much for their bodies and I felt so embarrassed about mine. Also, it looked like a small cage to me. I preferred the freedom of running outdoors.

    After some time thinking about it, I decided I had no options. Going to the gym was the only solution for me. There are machines that you can use to exercise without hurting your neck or your knees. I've been going one year and a half to the gym now and I'm so happy about it, I can't even put it into words.

    Also, while I keep doing some things at home for my neck, I discovered a way to help my neck that no physiotherapist has ever told me and I wish someone did. There's something called "the inverter board". I started using it to stretch my back and my neck, and I can't find any words either. After more than ten years going to physiotherapists, my bank account completely drained, and still very poor improvements, and my neck was increasingly getting worse and worse, and it was affecting me in every aspect of my life, then one day I googled about this board and I read about the benefits and something clicked in my head when I thought about my neck. I've made an amazing improvement in a few months, I feel 80-90% improvement.

    Then I found out that the problem of my knees was because of my flat feet. So, yeah, you are not the only one having a lot health issues! I have been to countless doctors and tried countless things for my feet. My entire life trying to find a solution, but nothing. Then, one day I decided to google about bad body posture. After spending quite a big amount of time in google, I finally found the answer. The answer was on my feet. My back, my knees and my hip, all misaligned because of my feet. Why on earth none of the professionals have ever told me about this? Anyways... Almost accidentally I decided to search in Amazon and... voila! hundreds of people claiming the same thing. People desperate, all their lives trying stuff that didn't work. Now you can buy an insole for your shoes specially designed for this problem for..... 15 euros. I've spent hundreds of euros and saw so many doctors.... for nothing...

    Five years later, I was feeling much better, but I had asthma and many allergies. I was told by doctors that this "has no solution"... until I found what boundaries are with Richard. When I discovered and practiced personal boundaries, my natural defences changed at the same time I "activated" my boundaries. My allergies have almost disappeared and my asthma is half severe it used to be. This happened overnight. I've taken so many drugs all my life. These medicines also have secondary effects.

    My advice is that you start believing these things can truly change your life  cheers

    Just as Richard says:

    - do exercise (the one you find best suits you)
    - eat healthy (yes, this is extremely important too)
    - fix your C-PTSR as much as you can (don't give up when you feel a little bit better)

    Cheers.
    D3lt4
    D3lt4


    Posts : 101
    Join date : 2018-07-24
    Location : Europe

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    Post by D3lt4 Thu Oct 11, 2018 7:30 pm

    Hey Jamie, sorry I was reading too fast your first post... so it seems like your problem is sweating too much because of social anxiety.. well, welcome to the club....! I solved this "problem" working harder on my C-PTSR and, very good for me, learning how to self-hypnotise myself. A bit scary the first time, but then you get used to it. Way easier than I thought........ of course with the help of a book, and the advice of Richard. Play it safe and work harder on your C-PTSR!
    D3lt4
    D3lt4


    Posts : 101
    Join date : 2018-07-24
    Location : Europe

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    Post by D3lt4 Thu Oct 11, 2018 7:31 pm

    I used to sweat rivers, but now I don't sweat at all. It feels a bit weird. I used to sweat so much... I look under my armpit.. where is my sweat?!
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    JamieB


    Posts : 9
    Join date : 2018-10-08

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    Post by JamieB Mon Nov 04, 2019 8:05 pm

    Hi D3lt4,

    I’d be interested to know what self hypnosis methods you tried?
    Is this along the lines of create visions/imagination?

    Thanks
    Jamie.
    sara44
    sara44


    Posts : 25
    Join date : 2016-10-28

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    Post by sara44 Sat Nov 09, 2019 2:08 am

    i visualize Jesus is standing next to me and is aware of the entire situation i'm in and what i'm experiencing.  I see his gentleness, his caring, his acceptance and his desire for me to feel relaxed and at peace.  He is the Prince of Peace and it truly does calm me down.  My reality is altered because of this visualization - He stays as long as i think of him.  My perspective on my problem is altered by his presence.  Hope that helps.

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