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Hello Richard!
I’m not a native speaker – hope this is readable anyway:
I’m currently in therapy because of co-dependency issues, attachment anxiety (one relationship as the avoidant part, the rest as the part who is afraid of loosing the partner) and recurring depression.
A study I read lately pointed out, that covert narcissism is accompanied by high levels of attachment anxiety (The Article is named : Overt and covert narcissism: Paradox of a construct).
Somehow this makes sense to me regarding the relationship between my parents - My mother shows traits of covert narcissism. I’m still not sure if she is, but she was very egocentric regarding her emotional needs and playing the victim was a very common behaviour of hers. My father was more the avoidant part in their relationship. As far as I know it's very common, that avoidant and "clingy" personality-types find eachother - both patterns are two faces of the same attachment anxiety.
I think my mother is the parent I learned the co-dependency and attatchment-disorder pattern from: In my relationship with her, love always meant to get her emotional needs met and being well-behaved. And if the love of my mother shaped my love for myself and my concept of relationships… well things fall into place here for me somehow.
Also it looks to me, that co-dependency and attachment anxiety (the fear-of-loss-part) are linked very closely.
Do these thoughts make sense to you somehow?
Is the combination covert narcessistic parent and child with attachment anxiety (with fear-of-loss-pattern) typical to you?
Thank you!
I’m not a native speaker – hope this is readable anyway:
I’m currently in therapy because of co-dependency issues, attachment anxiety (one relationship as the avoidant part, the rest as the part who is afraid of loosing the partner) and recurring depression.
A study I read lately pointed out, that covert narcissism is accompanied by high levels of attachment anxiety (The Article is named : Overt and covert narcissism: Paradox of a construct).
Somehow this makes sense to me regarding the relationship between my parents - My mother shows traits of covert narcissism. I’m still not sure if she is, but she was very egocentric regarding her emotional needs and playing the victim was a very common behaviour of hers. My father was more the avoidant part in their relationship. As far as I know it's very common, that avoidant and "clingy" personality-types find eachother - both patterns are two faces of the same attachment anxiety.
I think my mother is the parent I learned the co-dependency and attatchment-disorder pattern from: In my relationship with her, love always meant to get her emotional needs met and being well-behaved. And if the love of my mother shaped my love for myself and my concept of relationships… well things fall into place here for me somehow.
Also it looks to me, that co-dependency and attachment anxiety (the fear-of-loss-part) are linked very closely.
Do these thoughts make sense to you somehow?
Is the combination covert narcessistic parent and child with attachment anxiety (with fear-of-loss-pattern) typical to you?
Thank you!
